How to use labeling technique to find out what they really want?

You really want to know what is other person thinking about. When you hear "I have to think it over" or "It is complicated" it seems that your interlocutor doesn’t tell you directly all key information. And in such situations labeling method can be really helpful.

Don't feel their pain, label it

1. Label directly what you see (emotion / resistance / doubt)

🟠 It sounds like you're worried about how this will impact your team.

🟠 It looks like you feel this isn't the best use of the budget.

🟠 It sounds like you're concerned about the implementation.

2. Be quiet

Most important - don’t add "am I right?" or something similar. Just be silent.

3. Wait for your extra information

Other person will fill silence, either confirm and explain ("That's right, because...") or correct you and give the real reason ("No, the issue is...").

Why does it work?

By naming a negative emotion like frustration or fear you defuse it.

Other person feels heard and understood what switches off their defensive mode. Instead of fighting, they just start explaining.

With this simple method you create possibility to extract information without asking a additional questions.